After reasoning like this I started reading books on parapsychology one after another. First of all I read almost all the books written by Arthur Koestler, his autobiographical writings in which he discussed elaborately modern scientific theories also, and in which we found his advocacy for ESP and parapsychological research. However I did not read any single novel written by him, not even his famous ‘Darkness at Noon’. It was due to his writings that I was drawn towards studying modern physics and parapsychology at the same time. I came to know about the statistical research work done by J. B. Rhine. I read books by Louisa E Rhine and other authors on parapsychology. But even after reading many books on parapsychology (psi) and ESP I could not make any progress towards fulfilling the dream of my life, that is, proving the existence of God, because I could not think of any way by means of which the connection between the existence of God and the occurrence of the psi-events could be established. How to establish that these psi-events can occur only because there is a God? So eventually I realized that even if it was true that psi-events occurred regularly, it was also true that such psi-events could not help me prove the existence of God. Elsa E. Rhine has written on ESP: “People generally keep in touch with the world around them by sight, hearing, touch, taste, smell. But occasionally a person says he became aware of something when none of these channels operated, and then the argument begins. How did he know or did he actually know? Such debatable occurrences could be instances of extrasensory perception, or ESP.” (Book: Hidden Channels of the Mind, page 3) So, there is no doubt that the experiences of my personal life can be called genuine cases of extrasensory perception, because I had such experiences through none of the five senses mentioned above, but even such genuine cases of ESP helped me not a single bit towards fulfilling my dream. Thus being frustrated I stopped reading books on ESP altogether.
However I cannot say that I did not get any benefit from reading these books on parapsychology. Some of the authors of these books gave a list of the books that they have gone through before preparing their own book. I selected from such lists some books that I wanted to read. One day I was reading one such book sitting in the reading room of the National Library, Kolkata. It was either in the year 1982 or in 1983. At one place the author was describing as to how the light would take no time to travel even an infinite distance, because in the case of the light that infinite distance would be infinitely contracted to zero distance as a consequence of which time required for the light to travel that zero distance would also be zero. Here for the first time in my life I found that the author was describing the light as ‘timeless’. When I came across the word ‘timeless’, the first thought that came to my mind was this: Generally God is said to be timeless. Here the author is saying that the light is also timeless. What is the matter? So I concluded from this that this required further study, because I must have to know what connection was there between God and the light so that the light could also be called timeless.
In the late ’60 of the last century I have read the book ‘A B C of Relativity’ by Bertrand Russell, but I have not understood the real significance of the theory of relativity at that time. Einstein’s special theory of relativity opened its real significance to me only when I found for the first time that the word ‘timeless’ had been used as an attribute of the light. It will be no less true if I say that due to this single word ‘timeless’ used as an attribute of the light I was ultimately successful in proving the existence of God. But I must have to confess that I have committed the biggest blunder of my life here. While reading that book I have noted down neither the name of the book nor the name of the author of that book. Due to this blunder the posterity will never know the name of the person who put me on the right track while I was completely in the dark, not knowing at all what to do or in which direction to move. However if the book was written by Arthur Koestler himself, which possibility was very much there, because at that time I was reading Koestler’s books one after another, then it is Koestler to whom believers in God all over the world should be most grateful, because it was due to him only it has been possible for me to ultimately prove the existence of God.
From the theory of relativity I came to know that time and distance became unreal at the speed of the light. I also found that some of the attributes of God such as ‘spaceless’ and ‘timeless’ were not some meaningless words at all, but that they had real physical significance. This is because these words can be explained scientifically with the help of the properties of the light. This was a major breakthrough for me, and depending on this knowledge I decided that I would proceed in the following manner for proving the existence of God:
1) I would show that the entire universe was spaceless and timeless:
2) I would show that everything in this universe had originated from one substance only; and
3) I would show that the entire universe was an unbroken whole.
I thought that I would show these three things because in Hinduism Brahman, the Supreme Being, is called spaceless, timeless, one and indivisible. Brahman has other attributes also other than these four attributes, but I primarily chose these four only in order to show that there is a God. For 1) I thought that with the help of the properties of the light it would be easy for me to show that the entire universe is indeed spaceless and timeless. Then for 3) there was the phenomenon of quantum entanglement with which it could be easily established that the universe is indeed one unbroken whole, that each and every point of this universe is so interlinked with each and every other point of the same universe that no point of this universe can in no way be separated from any other point situated anywhere else in the universe. However for 2) I faced real difficulty, because I could not think of any substance from which it could be shown that everything else in this universe had originated. I speculated and speculated, but these were all idle speculations only, because they could not give me any fruitful result. Once I thought: Might not this primordial substance be energy? But I could not come to any definite conclusion about that. So ultimately I decided that I would show only 1) and 3) for the time being, and regarding the rest of the job I would leave that to posterity. After finally settling my mind in this manner I started writing my first book in Bengali in the year 2000.
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